Reproductive Loss
I am sorry for your loss.
Providing care to women, birthers, couples, and families impacted by reproductive loss forms the crux of my practice. These very real, life-altering losses are all too often diminished or unacknowledged entirely. Loved ones, acquaintances, colleagues, and even professionals may (with pure intentions) say or do things that cause more pain than comfort. Such platitudes, invalidating words, or complete disregard regarding your loss may result in what’s termed disenfranchised grief. Additionally, partners almost always grieve reproductive and perinatal losses differently. This creates feelings of loneliness during bereavement and may eventually lead to feelings of estrangement from your partner. With the right support, though, you can learn to live with grief while also experiencing new hope, joy, and purpose. I recognize your loss and validate your grief, in whatever way that looks and feels to you. It is my privilege to hear the story of your child’s life.
Allow me not to be remiss as a therapist in this space. Some people do not feel the need to mourn following a perinatal loss. Perhaps this event does not illicit the assumed feelings of bereavement. You are not an awful person and your feelings about the pregnancy had no impact on its outcome. Your grief may be delayed or this experience may not feel like a significant loss to you. In both hospital and private practice settings, I have worked with individuals who felt deeply ashamed to express feelings such as relief or apathy in regards reproductive loss. If this sounds like you, please know that your truth is equally valid and I welcome you into my practice without judgement.
Infertility is loss. Trying to conceive unsuccessfully month after month is emotionally, physically, socially, and oftentimes financially devastating. Whether you are trying to become a parent for the first time or are hoping to bring additional children into your family, being unable to do so can feel defeating. After a while, becoming pregnant may feel like an obsession, one that depletes your energy and distracts your attention from other aspects of your life. You can share this intimate loss with me without fear of judgement or dismissal. We will examine the impact of infertility on your emotional and physical health and on your personal relationships, and I can provide empathetic support as you process your grief and consider next steps that feel right for you.
Fertility challenges
You define your parenthood. Through my work in emergency rooms, delivery rooms, and post-surgical units, I am acutely aware that there is no universal standard of care for pregnancy loss. You may feel silenced in sharing your experience or forced to “move on” once you have physically recovered. In a moment, choosing baby’s carseat becomes choosing baby’s urn or casket. I can support you in honoring your baby’s life, no matter how brief. We will follow your timeline of bereavement and remembrance. I welcome siblings into session and am experienced in providing grief support to the entire family. Additionally, I can support you in addressing the often difficult and sensitive topics that follow a loss, including intimacy and future family planning.
Miscarriage & Stillbirth
You are surviving the unimaginable. Whether your baby lived moments or months outside the womb, you were forced to say goodbye far too soon. I have worked with individuals and couples who have lost an infant to complications of prematurity, congenital health conditions, SIDS, accidents, and abuse. I have supported parents in navigating palliative, hospice, and comfort care for their newborn or infant and am intimately familiar with the NICU environment. I can be a safe space for you to process your trauma, to speak those unspoken words, and to grieve in the way that feels authentic to you. We can discuss how to support surviving siblings, manage grief triggers, and parent your late child’s legacy moving forward.
Infant death
TFMR
You are not alone. The rhetoric used when discussing “termination of pregnancy” regardless of circumstance is biased and misleading. It’s often suggested that you were at choice when presented with devastating news about your baby and your pregnancy. Even if this suggestion were accurate, having choice does not negate loss. Pregnancy and infant loss for medical reasons is a deeply personal loss and one that I’d argue is universally misjudged by those without this lived experience. I invite you to share your pregnancy, your child, and your grief openly. I prioritize a therapeutic relationship that allows you to do so knowing that you are safe, supported, and seen.